The Official Joke Thread

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Snow
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Re: The Official Joke Thread

Post by Snow »

Ok so I haven't posted for a couple of months in here so I thought I would send you the text messages I have been recieving recently, some are old ones (like me :) ) and some will appeal to the Brits more.

After great sex, my Thai girlfriend lies there stroking my penis. I ask her if she wants more sex, she replies "No, I'm just admiring your cock...I really miss mine!"
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Snow
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Re: The Official Joke Thread

Post by Snow »

For Sale:
Sun Tan Lotion.
protects against ultra violet but not against harmful rays
previous owner....Steve Irwin


Sick I know but I found it amusing
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Snow
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Re: The Official Joke Thread

Post by Snow »

Paddy & Murphy have been down to that Devon looters beach
Paddy gets 5 Deckchairs and Murphy got 20 bags of sand!
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LeperMessiah26
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Re: The Official Joke Thread

Post by LeperMessiah26 »

Those are quality Snow :thumbs-up:
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Doin
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Re: The Official Joke Thread

Post by Doin »

I guess you've probably seen the Saddam videos from when he was hanged. Well a new one has just materialised - check it out.

http://www.metacafe.com/watch/382178/sa ... een_video/
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LeperMessiah26
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Re: The Official Joke Thread

Post by LeperMessiah26 »

Funny stuff...nice screams!!
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LeperMessiah26
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Re: The Official Joke Thread

Post by LeperMessiah26 »

3 naked men in a sauna,an American,a Japanese,and an Irishman

They hear a bleeping sound,the American touches his arm,and says thats my pager,i have a microchip under my skin.

Next,a phone rings,and the Japanese man lifts his plam to his ear,he says i have a microchip in my hand.

The Irishman..feeling very lowtech,went to the toilet,and came back with Toilet paper hanging from his arse..he says "Oh Jaysus,would ya look at that,im getting a fax!"
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Doin
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Re: The Official Joke Thread

Post by Doin »

Who is the last 100kg person to ride a Melbourne Cup winner ??


Scroll down for the answer


Chris Munz's cell mate !!
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Snow
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Re: The Official Joke Thread

Post by Snow »

I got interupted last time I posted so here are the rest:

A woman takes off her knickers and sits in a dentists chair with a leg on each arm.
The dentist says "You've made a mistake, the gynaecolgist's on the next floor."
"No mistake" she replied, "Yesterday you fitted my husband with new dentures, today I want you to take them out!"
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Snow
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Re: The Official Joke Thread

Post by Snow »

RACISIT ALERT:

A man was arrested for throwing petrol over crowds of muslims. The police asked what he thought he was doing.


"About 15 to the gallon"
We spit on those who choose to pose... we'll thrash with all the rest
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